I have conquered the hall closet!!!

A major milestone in this whole packing thing. Unfortunately, I have a lot of stuff to give away to friends and a free store and I have to wait until tomorrow to dole all that stuff out. So everything has been moved out and cleaned but is now sitting in the living room. It is WAY beyond clutter. And so I blog in order to avoid going downstairs and getting depressed by the mess.

Missing Battlestar Galactica BIG TIME. Thanks a lot, Anne. Couldn't you have turned me onto that series after they resume in 2009. Now I have to wait months until the last 10 episodes and it's killing me. Especially after watching hours and hours of it everyday--this cold turkey thing is agonizing.

But, seriously, if anyone hasn't seen this show--DO IT! I'd avoided it because I was picturing something akin to Stargate or Babylon 5. But it's really sci-fi of the best kind, using a futuristic world to bring up all sorts of issues about the nature of life, religion, government, etc. I mean, they deal with everything. And sides are always being twisted--no one (character or race) is always on the "right" side of the issues. It's fascinating. And they have surprisingly good music. And Mary McDonnell.

Ah, dinner is served. Must go eat.

Chipotle serves free food throughout Columbus!

And we didn't get any! Yay . . . ? We did drive by, but the line was way out the door and it didn't seem like an intelligent move to wait for an hour in the rain, hoping not to be struck by lightning just for a few burritos.

But it was a very, very good day, nonetheless. We got a notice telling us that we'd be getting the full 1,200 dollar economic stimulus check. NICE! We thought we wouldn't be getting much of anything, so that was a HUGE and very needed surprise.

AND we found out that we have housing at Wolfson, so we don't need to long distance apartment shop. Shwew! It will be tiny and disgustingly overpriced, but I'm SO excited!

Armed with that information, we were able to begin searching for primary schools for the girls. The closest are SS. Philip and James The Snobs (okay, the snob thing isn't actually part of the name), St. Barnabas and West Oxford Community Primary School. I don't think the snobby school will have vacancies this late and I'm really not interested in it anyway. After a cursory look, the other two seem about the same as far as scores, etc. We shall see . . .

And pictures are coming, Jessica. I wasn't very satisfied by this bunch. The exposure seems off lately even outside. Maybe I'll try some adjusting.

Not posting from Panera (just wanted Panera to make 3 titles in a row)

It’s Sunday and I’m pretty sure I won’t be able to post this until much later, but I will persist.

Gran is listening to the radio and that means that even with the door shut you can hear every word throughout the house. So we’re on the porch and the weather is lovely and the birds are singing. Niiiiice.

Uncomfortable anecdotes:

Yesterday Larry and Chloe took us out to some cafeteria style restaurant. I was afraid it would be like visiting a nursing home, but, amazingly enough, there were some young people there too. But, yes, white fuzzy heads abounded. I took advantage of being in the South and had turnip greens and yams and hush puppies along with the most enormous slice of lemon meringue pie ever. Ben and Moira both promised to help me eat it and then backed out at the last minute. I was forced to eat the entire thing by myself. Poor me.

Now on to the anecdotes:

Chloe was saying how on Sundays this cafeteria place is packed with all the post-church hordes. The Catholics with their early services come first, then the Baptists, and the “black people” are always last. At this point Evie asked (very loudly), “Why are the black people always last?” Cringe.

Later Moira asked Larry one of my favorite riddles—What’s brown and sticky? The answer is: a stick. But Larry (who can’t hear anymore and is therefore VERY loud) was guessing things like ‘an African American boy’s hands’ and ‘a Mexican boy’s hands.’ Cringe again. (But I do like seeing Larry and Chloe and Jan and Dewey. They spoil the girls rotten and they’re always entertaining.)

Then last night (I knew the lull was too good to be true) we lingered a little too long at the dinner table and Gran suddenly launched into an excruciating, toe-curling lecture on End Times prophecy that went on and on and on. Somehow we were finally able to escape the table, but once we sat down in the living room it started up again. But I’ve been perfecting the art of not making eye contact and becoming extremely, extremely engrossed in a book. Add to that the new sound blocking earbuds for the mp3 player, and I was able to completely ignore the 2^nd half of that preaching session.

Okay, now it’s Monday and we’re BACK HOME!!! Ben is acting like a man that’s just gotten out of prison. He keeps listing all the things he loves about being home. Finally Moira was like, “Okay, why don’t we just sum it up by saying it’s good to be home.” Parents, sheeesh.

Once again it was sad to leave Gran. I hate to think of her living there alone. I wish she had a nice, spry 80 year old roommate or something. Despite all the stresses of S.C. visits, I do appreciate that she loves us to bits and just wants us to be happy . . . her kind of happy, but happy nonetheless. It’s always so sweet to see her and the girls together just eating up each other’s love.

But, damn, it's good to be home.

(Oh, and we just saw the first episode of Weeds, season 4. Yes! They still got it.)

At Panera again

This time as a paying customer.

The weather here has been remarkably cool for South Carolina and we're outside enjoying the breeze.

Uh-oh. Employee is lowering umbrellas. Are we going to get kicked out?

I wish I had more exciting things to talk about. This trip has been amazingly low-key, low-stress. There's been a definite drop in Gran's preachiness and that's a great thing for our nerves. Unfortunately, this means no amusing anecdotes.

Did I mention that she's doing great by the way? She's using the walker a lot, but she's eating well and isn't sleeping any more than she always has. I guess this is a huge improvement to her previous condition--pre-pacemaker and post-broken wrist. We've stopped believing that she will ever die. All her claims that she's not long for this world are LIES.

The only really horrifying things that have happened so far are repeated run-ins with old lady underclothing. I swear to God, her underwear just keeps appearing places. Doorhandles, etc. I am thoroughly scarred by this. Thoroughly. And one of her bras is hanging in the laundry closet.

Sleep has improved. These deluxe air mattresses ROCK. That or I'm just really easily pleased.

Watched Eyewitness with Sigourney Weaver. It was horrible. I expected as much from a 1981 thriller, and I was really hoping for some laughs. But, if you can believe it, the acting was just barely good enough to miss laughable and land on the side of incredibly boring. Sigourney did have a really cheesy scream that was great. Bad movie, reeeeeeally bad movie. I've been pretty self-punishing with my Netflix picks lately. At least this one I was able to watch until the end.

Also saw Lars and the Real Girl. Very good.

Mandy, I'm glad to hear about your rest station handwashing etiquette.

Jessica, I'm holding fast to your dream interpretation.

Hmmm, I really feel like I'm letting everyone down. These S.C. trips are usually so blogworthy.

I don't like it when cashiers, waitresses, etc. call me Hon. Or is that spelled 'hun.' No, I don't think so. But even that is better than when we went to Cap City Diner and the guy kept referring to me as 'the young lady.' "And for the young lady . . . ?" Don't patronize me.

My battery is going to die so I'd better just post this and give up on saying anything the least bit interesting.

Currently stealing wi-fi from Panera while sitting in the car in the parking lot

Reaching new heights of cheapness and feeling very naughty.

I forgot to say that we’re going to South Carolina this week. I thought I’d be able to post like last time, but stealing wi-fi at Gran’s is not working out. Thus the Panera escapade. But I didn't want to let you down and go a whole week without a post soooooooo--the following was written during the drive down just for ya'll—

Highlights of the journey so far:

(Kentucky)

Went to bed at midnight and got up at 4, so I’m feeling a little loopy. When I’m tired everything seems to move in slow motion and then all of a sudden I’ll be struck by some incredibly intense random emotion. Thus, for no reason at all, I experienced a distinct sense of euphoria while walking past the coffee/pseudo cappuccino area in the Pilot gas station. Weeee!

Pilot gas station: Cashier perks up as a song comes over the radio—“Uh-oh—iiiit’s the Macarena.” I imagine all the employees suddenly performing a dance routine quite against their will. The dangerous power of the Macarena.

Ate at Wendy’s amongst a lunch rush of very, very dirty (I assume) construction workers. I mean, coal miner dirty.

A man sat at the table cleaning his nails with a dangerous looking knife.

Pulled the tomato off my cheese sandwich at Wendy’s—didn’t trust Kentucky to know what tomatoes they’re using. I guess I’m a . . . what would a person who discriminates based on location be called . . . a geographist? It’s just in Columbus right now you can’t get tomatoes in the restaurants even though Ohio tomatoes have been cleared in this whole tomato/salmonella thing.

On this journey I’ve thought about Mandy quite a bit while choosing which bathroom stall to use. Also thought of Mandy while washing my hands and had superior thoughts of hygiene snobbery.

Am I the only person who instantly knows who Judith Ivey is? Probably not something to be particularly proud of. She’s reading an audio book our friends leant Moira for the journey.

I hate audio books. Especially those about self-aware toy rabbits.

Revising previous opinion about audio books. Judith Ivy was amazing—the voices and accents she did were awesome. I still didn’t like the story. Grrrr, self-aware rabbit. I may just check out the Harry Potter audio books. I’ve heard really good things about them and ( ) but I thought those recommendations were the products of delusional minds. How could an audio book be tolerable, let alone good. We shall see.

Wednesday--

Arrived yesterday safe and sound despite Ben’s dad’s horrible driving skills. He tailgates like none other.

This morning the Palestinians have already been mentioned.

The kids are having a blast playing with a portion of Chloe’s loaned Barbie collection.

Still feeling loopy today. I slept horribly last night. Every little sound woke me up and then I had this awful nightmare that combined Cylons from Battlestar Galactica and a serial killer. I kept waking up and then falling asleep to the exact same dream. It was so gruesome—ugh. In one part of the dream I briefly transformed into Susan Sarandon. What’s it all mean?

Hopefully I'll be posting again and sending some very overdue e-mails (Jessica). Maybe we'll even go inside Panera next time.

Faith

Get some headphones, 'cause this is esp. for you.



P.S. I got your message. I knew it would work out. But . . . did you get the pants too?

Quick post (and this time there are no expletives!)

Moira's last day of school was yesterday. Her assessment--"This was an awesome year." It was a great experience for her--she toughened up quite a bit, learned a lot about human nature and how to deal with jerks, managed to stay incredibly sweet despite learning about human nature, turned math into one of her favorite subjects when it had previously been something she struggled with, and had a great time. Obviously, she still loves school.

So today begins the first day of packing. I am NOT leaving this to the last minute. I sorted through the adult books (you know--books adults read, not "adult books") and packed what we want to keep and made a give-away pile and a taking to England pile. Unfortunately, Ben's going to England book pile is quite large. By the way, anyone who wants any of our possessions can claim dibs and borrow it for 1-4 years plus. Who knows what the future will bring. The flat screen and elliptical machine have already been claimed. Anything else is still up for grabs. Couches anyone? They're nice. Anyone need a girly purple fish tank plus equipment to keep forever and ever. (I can hear the crickets chirping.)

I am exhausted by this whole election thing. Perhaps I will be revitalized when Obama really begins to go up against McCain. And any Democrat who would vote for McCain just because they're pissed off that Obama got the nomination instead of Clinton should be slapped. Slapped and then denied the right to vote. Then slapped again.

Anne Marie is in town and we will be seeing her in exactly one hour!

Hungry.

"I'm going to take a long and plaintive piss in that little asshole's chair."

Tribute to a movie that should have been better.



I'm putting this up only because Mandy said we all suck at posting. And while this doesn't exactly count as a post, I think seeing Alan Rickman load up on water and take that piss is worth it.